31 Frightful Films – #31 Pontypool

And so we arrive at the end. 31 scary movies in 31 days. Our final film was Pontypool. Released in 2008 and starring Stephen McHattie (Quinlan from The Strain, and Hollis in Watchmen) as a talk radio guy in Ontario, Pontypool is about a small town radio show and the entire film takes place inside the radio station. The morning of February 14 begins slowly, but news reports start to filter in from listeners that there is a riot. Then the rioters are killing people. Then eating them. No one can reach the police and there is no news on the wire service. The three people in the station must rely on the eye-witness reports of the people calling into the show.

Christa’s review

This was definitely unique. Not what I was expecting at all. I wasn’t scared at any point, but there was definitely a creeping sense of what the fuck is happening here. As a rule I don’t like zombies. I just don’t think mindless villains are interesting at all, but Pontypool was pretty good. Mostly because the majority of scares take place off-screen, I think. Until they don’t. But it’s definitely not your run-of-the-mill scream, run, chainsaw, run, scream some more boring zombie shit. Without giving anything away, it brings up really interesting ideas about how we know what we know, our relationship with the press, and the nature of language. I give it a half-Afghan for pure originality.

Dana’s review

Definitly not your usual zombie flick, but not bad either. They manage to do away with the stumblers, walkers, sprinters, and pretty much every other version of a zombie and come up with their own unique take on the whole thing while bringing a fresh take on how to tell a movie. No real gross out except for one scene, and even that was tame to me. No real suspense either. Just a movie that left me saying, damn. Grab some popcorn and watch this one if you like to watch movies a little off the beaten path. I think you will enjoy it.

OUR TOP FIVE FRIGHTFUL FILMS

Christa’s five:

1. Sinister
2. The Taking of Deborah Logan
3. Grave Encounters
4. The Awakening
5. Oculus

Dana’s five:

1. Sinister
2. Oculus
3. Stitches
4. The Awakening
5. Grave Encounters

 

31 Frightful Films – #30 The Frighteners

After the trauma of the eyeball-dryingly scary Deborah Logan movie last night, we were ready for something lighter. And to be honest, we’re both pretty damn weary of scary movies at this point. So, we watched a film we considered early on and eliminated because we didn’t want any comedy in the mix. The film was The Frighteners, a 1996 horror/comedy starring Alex P. Keaton. The premise: There’s a series of unexplained deaths in a small town. Enter Frank Bannister, a psychic investigator. For a price he will clear your home of poltergeists, restless spirits, whatever. Here’s his game: He’s actually got a trio of ghosts who do his bidding. They fuck shit up so the people pay Frank. Of course, Frank gets mixed up in the string of deaths and there’s a pretty widow and a dumb sheriff and a creepy FBI dude.

Christa’s review

Afghan of Doom fell asleep.

It’s an interesting idea, certainly. The ghost effects are pretty dated, though and the whole thing came across more as a kids movie. But on the other hand there are bad words and some stuff is kinda spooky. I wouldn’t let my kid watch it, but it didn’t quite feel like it was for grownups, either. The only funny bits are with the indentured ghosts, and Michael J. Fox is not really his likable charming self in this. Afghan of Doom was not impressed.

Dana’s review

I’d heard about this one but don’t recall ever watching it. Interesting take on a scary movie, more inline with something like Beetlejuice than Nightmare on Elmstreet. No real scary moments, and no real gore, but it did have it’s humorous moments. I actually would love to see this movie remade with today’s technology and some actual scares in it. That could be interesting. If looking for a more lighthearted movie with little scare, but ghosts in it, then this would be worth the watch. But if looking for that classic, scary movie, then give this a pass.

31 Frightful Films – #29 The Taking Of Deborah Logan

Although this film came out this year, we’ve heard nothing about it. It sounded depressing, but we decided to give it a shot. What the hell, right? We’re in the home stretch. The Taking of Deborah Logan is about a medical student named Mia who is working on a film about Alzheimer’s patients and their caretakers. She and her crew arrive at the home of Deborah Logan who is suffering from the early stages of the disease. Her adult daughter, Sarah, is her primary caretaker. Alzheimer’s is heartbreakingly sad of course, but Deborah’s disease seems to be progressing faster than expected and she goes from a charming and gracious–if forgetful–woman to…something else over the course of just a few weeks. Mia and Sarah begin to suspect that the disease is not the only thing going on and begin to investigate.

Christa’s review

All the way scared.

Wow, this was an unexpected treat. Scary as hell, this one has everything: the non-supernatural horror of Alzheimer’s, creeping doom, spooky shit captured on cameras in the middle of the night, nocturnal wandering, violence, mystery, crime. What more could you ask for? A cast of strong female characters? Check. I didn’t actually notice–and that’s good!–until I sat down to type this that all the main roles, the action roles, are women. Deborah and her daughter of course, then the med student making the film, Deborah’s physician, and even (gasp!) the county sheriff. I dug that. But more importantly, this is just a great scary movie (at one point, Gunny was basically sitting in my lap) with genuinely frightening shit, a solid plot, and a satisfying ending.

Dana’s review

Just flipping though Netflix and noticed this little gem and decided, looks like it might scare me, so lets give it a shot, shall we. At first, I thought that the fact I recognized some of the cast might take me out of the movie, that didn’t last long as I quickly got sucked in to this disturbing take on demonic possession. It takes the all too real and very scary disease of Alzheimer and winds itself into a twisted tale of demonic possession. It dares to do things other movies never do and it does a great job with it. If this isn’t on your watch list, it should be.

31 Frightful Films – #28 Audition

We’ve heard over and over how great this Japanese film is. I rented and downloaded it to take on vacation, but never watched it. Today Gunny had an appointment, and knowing he’ll never be able to watch 2 movies tonight after the Sprout goes to bed, I watched this on my own. The film is Audition, from 1999 and starring Ryo Ishibashi and Eihi Shiina, The premise is a widower’s teenage son tells him he should remarry. He tells his film producer friend his intention to find a new wife and the friend comes up with a plan: to hold auditions for a fake movie and to cast a young, skilled, and “obedient” woman to be a wife. Aoyama becomes enamored of a girl named Asami–a former ballerina. The film producer warns Aoyama that Asami’s references and resume do not add up, but Aoyama doesn’t listen and pursues the girl.

Christa’s Review

At first this was sort of like “Sleepless in Toyko.” The father and son relationship is sort of charming, and even the film producer’s plan seemed more genuinely helpful than sleazy. My chunks began to rise when obedience was listed as a good quality in a wife, but I scolded myself to stop painting everything with my American brush. Anyway, this being a horror film, I knew things would go wrong, but I didn’t know how. When Asami’s references and things couldn’t be verified I thought maybe she was a ghost. And then some shit happened and I thought, “okay, a vengeful ghost.” Long story short, this veered into torture which I stated at the beginning of this 31 film marathon I simply don’t want to watch. I admit fast-forwarding a bit because I just don’t need that shit in my head. I don’t know what the fuck happened in this movie. I read some of the IMDB message boards and it seems like no one knows what the deal is. Some people absolutely love this film, but I am decidedly not one of them.

31 Frightful Films – #27 Tucker and Dale vs. Evil

Okay, we knew this was a comedy going in, but we needed something a little forgiving this morning. Tucker and Dale vs Evil fit the bill nicely. It’s a 2010 film starring Wash from Firefly and some other people. The premise is that two Hillbillies go for a weekend in Tucker’s newly-acquired “vacation home” a.k.a. a nasty cabin which was the scene of the Memorial Day Massacre. Meanwhile, a bunch of snotty college kids are headed to the Appalachians for a weekend of booze and sex. You know, how college kids do. Dale (the not-Wash hillbilly) sees co-ed Allie at a gas station. His shy attempts to chat her up are interpreted as creepy and threatening by the collegiate brats, which leads to misunderstanding upon misunderstanding upon a series of gory deaths.

Christa’s review

Very fun. The myriad of ways the college kids bite it–and have it appear to their classmates that Tucker and Dale are responsible–are clever, funny, and hit all the horror movie mainstays. This is really a movie about stereotypes, and if there is an anti-defamation league for Appalachian Americans they should stand up and cheer.

You know, if they could read this.  Well worth a watch.

Dana’s review

We decided to take on a slightly lighter movie today as we are getting closer towards the end of our countdown, and went with Tucker and Dale. What a great little light hearted movie that takes the classic horror movie staple of killer rednecks, and said, “What if.” Imaginative kills and deaths, that will make you chuckle. Sit back some popcorn and enjoy this flick.

31 Frightful Films – #26 Deliver Us From Evil

This one just came out on DVD this week, so it’s not free anywhere we’ve seen yet. We’ll let you decide whether it’s worth paying for after you’ve read our reviews. Deliver Us From Evil is based on what an NYPD cop claims actually happened. The premise: Marines in Iraq discover a strange underground shrine of some kind. Two years later back to their regular lives in The Bronx, weird shit starts to happen. A couple of special ops cops, The Worst Hulk and The Dude From Community investigate a series of crimes involving the former soldiers and the people in their lives. An eccentric/rogue Catholic priest is convinced there are demonic forces at work and keeps popping up with offers to help.

Christa’s review

The first half of this had me cowering under the Afghan of Doom. When I saw this creepy owl toy in the cop’s daughter’s bedroom I suddenly remembered it was in the trailer and the reason I didn’t want to see this movie in the first place. Creepy toys are not okay. I still have PTSD from watching Dead Silence half a dozen years ago. This movie, with its creeping doom, cryptic writing, and startles was well on its way to matching or even besting our current champ Sinister for quality scares. I found the heroine addict priest intriguing. And hot. But then the film took a turn toward the mundane: an exorcism scene that offered nothing new or interesting. The Power of Christ compelled me to lose interest entirely. What started as a Full Afghan devolved into a Half Afghan.

How do you say “hottie” in Latin?

Dana’s review

I have no recollection of this movie ever hitting the theaters, which is weird because of the amount of movies I see. But anyways, it is fresh new release for home viewing, so we thought we would give it a shot. I loved the build up in the movie. Freaky stuff is going on right off the back and you are constantly hit with a quick scare or spooky music to make you tense, never knowing what is coming next. But when it comes time for the exorcism, it had very little new to offer. It wasn’t a pea soup spewing, head spinning, demonic possession, but it was something that has been seen before. The addition of the weird crown of thorn type scars that appeared freshly over the possessed forehead was pretty cool, but overall the final act was kind of a let down. Watchable if you just want to see a decent possession movie, but don’t expect anything you really haven’t seen before.

 

31 Frightful Films – #25 Grave Encounters

I admit passing over this one several times on Netflix because the name seemed stupid. Now that I know the title of the movie is that of the TV show that is the premise, I don’t find it so bad. Grave Encounters is a 2011 film by The Vicious Brothers. Here’s the premise: A reality show featuring ghost-hunters or paranormal investigators sets out to make their sixth episode in an abandoned Maryland insane asylum. This is the footage that was left behind. A frightened-looking producer tells us it has only been edited for time.

Christa’s review

All the way scared.

I’m SO glad we watched this in daylight. It was scary as fuck. It had just the right pacing with the joking and cynicism of a film crew and then the slow burn as they are locked in by the caretaker. A couple weird things happen, and then it all goes to shit. Part of the genius of this is that there is no electricity in this abandoned building so all light comes from the crew and a lot of it is night-vision. Like the best unsettling films the things you don’t see are far worse than those you do. This one offers up scares both mind-fucky (time becomes fluid as in Oculus) and jump-out-at-you startling. This is a must-see if you want a good scare.

Dana’s review

Holy balls sweat! I’m glad this was a day time encounter because if it had been dark, I would of had to change my underwear. And probably got rid of the couch. This is a great example of a slow burn as you are waiting for things to happen. And as the movie progresses, you start to see little things that hint to much bigger things afoot than what you are actually seeing. Fantastically done and loved it. The gore is nonexistent but the suspense is fantastic. Definitely one to add to your list of movies to watch for Halloween, or anytime for that matter.

31 Frightful Films – #24 Playback

We were a little leary of this because of the debacle that was V/H/S, but we gave Playback a chance. It’s from 2012 and stars a bunch of teenagers (or young-looking actors) plus Christian Slater. Yes, that Christian Slater. The idea of this film is that evil can be transferred through images (not completely dissimilar to Sinister, which you may remember is our reigning butt-puckeringly scary favorite). So here’s the deal: Fifteen years ago, a terrible mass murder happened in this town and a family was wiped out. Now, in present day, a high school student is doing a film project on “The Diehl Murders” for a school project. Local grownups discourage him from digging up bad memories, but he perseveres with the help of his girlfriend and friends in researching and reenacting the crime on video.He gets a guy who works as an archivist at the local TV news station to dig up the real footage of the crime and that’s when the evil is released.

Dana’s review

This movie reminded me a little of The Ring with it’s use of video as a transfer device for evil. Not an exceptionally scary movie, but then again, we watched it with the lights on in the middle of the day, so that had something to do with it, I’m sure. I did like the story on how a picture captures a potion of the persons soul, so a motion picture actually captures a bit of them, and the history of the motion picture that was included in the film. Overall, very watchable. Not over the top scary or gory.

Christa’s review

This was pretty good. I would have been more scared if we’d watched it at night with the lights off, so I take responsibility for some of the unscariness. Although the film plays with ideas that have been explored before–heck, how many times have we heard the trope about photographs capturing the soul?–it did so in a unique way that also explored ideas of inherited evil. Slater as a corrupt and perverted cop was surprising, but I found myself wondering more about his career choices than really buying into his portrayal. Again, that may be my own personal baggage. This film delivered some good scares. I saw the twist coming, but that didn’t negatively effect my enjoyment. I give this half an Afghan of Doom with the caveat that it probably would be an eyeball-peeker if I’d watched under proper conditions.

 

 

31 Frightful Films – #23 Contracted

I’m always up for a good pandemic/virus flick, so Contracted was an easy choice. This film was made in 2013 and stars no one you’ve ever seen before. Basically, the poster is what intrigued us. The premise: Girl has a one-night stand and contracts the nastiest STD ever.

Christa’ review

First up, the so-called “one night stand” was a rape. So if this film was meant as a cautionary tale about promiscuity, it can fuck right off. There’s a lot of whining and bleeding in this movie, and not much sense. The main character, Samantha, is a moron and there are sub-plots and backstories about past drug use and lesbianism that perhaps are supposed to add depth, but…derp. It’s as if the “IDK my BFF Jill” girl grew up and starred in a low budget piece of crap. It’s not scary. It IS gross, and I think they used their budget on special effects because they certainly didn’t spend money on the cast. The acting is awful across the board. I’m trying not to write spoilers, but I do want to warn off potential viewers. Here’s what I’ll say: See the girl on the poster up there? That’s Samantha. She goes around town looking LIKE THAT, and no one cringes in horror or takes her to the E.R. Skip this unless you’re watching purely for make-up and gross-out effects.

Dana’s review

Yes! Loved it! Not for the great story or acting, but for the gross out effects. If you like to be grossed out, then this is a MUST SEE! But for me, it was grossed out in a good way. I was constantly cheering for what the next gross event would be, only to have them surpass it. There is one issue that came up where it looked like it might have been a bit of a continuity error, but I just looked past that and kept right on trucking. Remember guys and gals, always wrap that sucker to avoid the gonorsyphalitus.

31 Frightful Films – #22 Carrie

This 2013 film starring Chloe Grace Moretz and Julianne Moore is billed as a “re-imagining” of the classic 1976 film starring Sissy Spacek as the poor little telekinetic girl on prom night. I’m not sure if that’s supposed to less offensive than “re-boot,” but it’s a re-make. Same story, same characters. I think of a re-imagining as a significant change like if Carrie had been Carl, or the whole thing had taken place during the Civil War or something. Anyway, enough semantics. You know the story of Carrie: Don’t bully a girl with telekinesis.

Christa’s review

This is a solid remake. The 1976 version is so full of young actors that later became famous that it’s nearly impossible to lose yourself in the story when you see Coal Miner’s Daughter promming with The Greatest American Hero while Danny Zucco sets a bucket of pig’s blood in the rafters. The story is brought into the modern era in believable ways (this time, someone gets video of the “Plug it up” scene), and the cast is solid. Julianne Moore is almost sympathetic. My only quibble with the casting is that Chloe Grace Moretz is too pretty for Carrie White. Carrie is a plain girl. Not just because her mother dresses her or she’s terribly shy. Carrie White shouldn’t have flowing strawberry blonde hair and pouty lips. She just shouldn’t. Chloe did a good job though–being horrified and then fascinated with her new-found powers. It’s tough to telekinetically lay waste to your prom without striking odd Nora Desmond/Yzma poses, so that part was a bit goofy. Wasn’t a bit scary of course, but worth watching.

 

Dana’s review

It’s been a long time since I had seen the original Carrie film, so I was able to watch this one with an almost fresh set of eyes. Granted, I still remember the basics of the movie, but all the little things leading to the end were new for me again. Overall, I did like it. There were a couple of “gross” and “yuck” comments coming from Christa, but I didn’t find it that bad at all. I really enjoyed the way the gym scene and I was rooting for Carrie at the end. The choice of Hit Girl as Carrie in this flick was a little weird to me, because I always thought of Carrie as a homely girl, and not that attractive. That isn’t the case with Hit Girl though and drew me out of the film a little bit. Not a bad movie IMO, and worth a watch.